Birds (class Aves) are bipedal, warm-blooded, egg-laying vertebrate animals. Birds evolved from theropod dinosaurs during the Jurassic period, and the earliest known bird is the Late Jurassic Archaeopteryx. Ranging in size from tiny hummingbirds to the huge Ostrich and Emu, there are around 10,000 known living bird species in the world, making them the most diverse class of terrestrial vertebrates.
And OH MY GOD CAN THEY POOP. Maria & I were sitting at the beach watching the kids play on a pirate ship playset... when all of a sudden AN ANGRY MUTANT BIRD PROCEEDED TO SHAT POO ALL OVER MY FACE AND BACK. I'm like "what the hell was that" as I feel this hit me...I thought someone ran by us on the boardwalk and threw something at me. I look at my shirt and look up and realize that one of those huge seagulls that everyone feeds thrasher's fries has decided to try a pinpoint anal assault on ME. I was sitting within a foot of Maria on one side, and our stroller on the other.
The bird COMPLETELY MISSED MARIA, DELILAH & THE STROLLER and just totally destroyed me. Maria couldn't stop laughing as I used wipies and desperately tried to get it all off of me.
If I ever see this bird again I will have my alka seltzer tabs ready
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
5 comments:
Honestly people it was the funniest thing I think I have every seen. I laughed so hard I cried..and then I laughed a whole lot more.
I'm going to change your nickname to Shitwick ;-) Poor thing!
One time I was at the aquarium inside of the rainforest exhibit and I was watching all the tropical birds fly around. Well all of the sudden I hear this scream followed by lauging and I come to find out that a non-english speaking tourist girl had just encountered a similar experience. As her friends pointed and laughed an aquarium employee pulled out a pack of tissues and said, "don't worry miss, happens all the time".
if i found myself in your same situation, i would have taken off my shirt and left it there as a memorial to what had just happened. You on the other hand, would have done that and been shortly there after flocked to, not by more birds, but by screaming women. Thanks for not making a scene on the boardwalk...
Just think of all of the good luck you'll have now!
Post a Comment