I borked my toe!

Yeah... tell me you know someone other than me that can manage to BREAK HIS FREAKING TOE getting out of bed in the morning. I've never broken any bones before, so this is sort of a big deal. And being that I broke a bone in my foot means that walking around SUCKS DONKEY NUTS. I'm having to walk around like a wounded duck waddling around the place, having people feel sorry for me and whatnot.

Here's how it went down. The alarm went off.. so I jump up and lean out of the bed on my left leg (I put the alarm clock out of reach.. cause if I don't I'll never get up). I still basically have my right leg in the bed and when I go to put my right foot down I completely and utterly fall flat on my face.. accompanied by a nice little "snap". My right leg was asleep and I didn't even realize it until it was too late. Refer to my "MAD" paint skills for a re-enactment.

So I lay there for a minute still trying to wake up and take in what the hell just happened. My leg is still asleep and I think I just broke my foot. Then I get that rush of nausea which I hear accompanies a broken bone... and I just lay there till that passes.

Being cheap I'm playing doctor here.. no need to pay 200 bucks for some MD to tell me that I broke my little toe. I sure would like some crutches though...

At least I got a guitar... :)

Maybe I'm Asian?

So yeah... I've had some of the closest people in my life tell me that I must have some Asian ancestry. First thing Maria does when this topic of conversation comes up is go to my wallet and gets out a picture of my grandmother (who is NOT asian) and says "she how Asian she looks".

Then this "Asian Issue" I have (don't get me wrong.. I love the Asians) came to the forefront during a roadtrip to see the David Crowder Band in Virginia a few years back. It was held at a Korean Church in a rather affluent suburb of Washington D.C. So we get close and pull into the parking lot, and there are dozens of church members wearing these reflective vests (and looking very Asian might I add). I see them waving at the cars in front of ours... then when we drive by the first guy he BOWS when we drive by. I think it's just an isolated incident... I look in my rear view mirror and the same guy who just BOWED to me is now waving at the non-Asian family in the car behind us.

So now we get to the next guy, and he's doing the same thing.. reflective vest, waving at the various families around.. then this guy really BOWS at our car. Maria and I break into hysterical laughter now... "they think I'm Asian? This is awesome!"

I made the mistake of telling my co-workers about this... from that day on they now BOW when they see me pull into the parking lot.

Funny Movies

I had a lot of fun at work the other day. It was a monday, so the office was nearly empty since we've gone to optional 4 day work-weeks. We got on the topic of funny movies and re-enacting our favorite clips. We got sidetracked on funny tv shows like "Seinfeld" and "The Office". But one scene a few of us really got a laugh about was the one in the movie "Old School" with Will Ferrell. There is a scene where he is at a children's birthday party and ends up shooting himself in the neck with a tranquilizer gun and falling to the bottom of the pool, then french kissing a guy. If you haven't seen it then you need to get out more.

Click here if you want to get out more or here and you gotta click here

One of the funniest movies evar.. as decided by the AWB Crew

So You Think You Can Play The Guitar?

I've been thinking lately that I want a nice cheap little acoustic guitar. Like a nice Yamaha or something. I love playing air guitar and actually used to play the bass guitar with my old roommate, who is now a rock star (albeit still somewhat minor) in the band alesana.

Fast forward a few weeks and my wife says "what do you want for Christmas"... I say without hesitation "A Yamaha acoustic guitar". "But you don't play the guitar" she says. "But I want to learn how" I shoot back. "I'm not buying you a guitar, they are too expensive" she retorts. "Well, then I'll just get my good buddy Jim Perdue to buy me one." I say.

I taste test chicken a few times a week and get paid $20 a pop for eating a few chicken nuggets or something and telling them what I think. It think it averages out to around $3 per bite or something along those lines. Next time I go in I'll count my bites and come up with an official number. I could save this money up to buy my guitar, but it's my allowance money. I get to eat out with my co-workers and put gas in my car with it. Without this money I would have no friends at work and would have to ride my bike.

I have a dream of me playing the guitar and my son Holden being my sole backup dancer. I might even consider having Kevin Freeloa.... I mean Federline come over to show him some moves. Maybe even rap in my songs with his funky nice rhymes. It could be awesome, fo sho

Suck & Associates, Inc.

So I've had roughly 4 or 5 jobs since college, most of them crap (probably all of them crap up until the one I have now). I was thinking about how there is now way I will ever go back to my last job to say hi to my old co-workers. It's not because I don't like them, I do, they were good guys to work with. It's how I was let go and the feeling that I would be arrested for trespassing if I were to step a foot on the property.

It's not a rational fear, I don't actually thing anything bad would happen. About 2.5 years ago I decided to put my resume out there just to see what kind of interest I would receive. I got an offer from a company about 3 blocks from my house (at this time my round trip commute was about 1.5 hours). I told my then boss that I had a doctor's appointment and went on the interview. I did several interviews and they offered me a job. I contemplated the offer and decided to take it, thinking my old boss wouldn't come close to offering me the same salary. I told him about it and gave him my two weeks notice. "How much are they offering you" he asked me... I told him and he said no problem, we can match that. "Oh, crap" I thought.. I didn't actually think he would do this. "Well, if I were to stay here it would have to be for $x,000 more than this offer. "Ok, that's fine".... major Oh Crap now... So I tell him that I'll stay on at this new figure.

I go back to my desk and wonder why I didn't have the balls to stand my ground and give my two weeks like I had made up my mind to. I knew I didn't have a future at this small family owned company, so wrote a letter to my boss and left it on his desk that night telling him that I'm taking the other job (I only left a letter because he already left)

He called me into his office the next morning and let me go right then and there. With only one additional paycheck... while the law says you are entitled to two weeks pay for two weeks notice, I didn't want any more hard feelings and I was able to start and the new job the next day anyway. My old boss also told me my job would still be there if I wanted to come back.

My next job pretty much sucked though. I came to find out last week while talking to a friend (who is to this day a current employee of... I'll call them Suck & Associates) that I was only hired for this one big job they had. If I would have known my position was only intended to be short-term I wouldn't have taken it. Why the asshats didn't tell me this in the multiple interviews I had to take to get the job I have no idea.

To this day I am friends with the guy who I worked there with, we were talking the other day about what a sucky place it is. The bosses are total control freaks and hate technology. They rue the day that the computer became prominent in the architecture/design industry and would always require we do things "the right way" (more like the long ass, hard, written by hand way). I'm constantly telling my friend to get out of there and into a real design firm, and leave on his own terms (instead of getting laid off like me).


The one good thing that came of this was the experience (and a damn good recommendation). It helped me get into the position I'm in now.. making more money in a large firm with room to move up the ladder.

Wicked Nice Hangtime

Yeah, i've been doing pretty awesome at this blog updating so far. Life is pretty busy. Work is going good. My boss approched me and asked me if I wanted to become a licensed Architect or not, so I said "why not" (not really). So I guess now I get to start my 8 year internship and see what happens.

I've been getting paid to eat chicken lately, which is rather nice. Perdue has this Innovation Center here in town that does all sorts of experiments on chicken and then pay you to tell them what you think of it. The only drawback so far is the copious amounts of methane gas I have been producing since I started doing it. When I get back to work I have the habit of releasing gas with some "wicked nice hangtime" in other people's cubicles. I'm becoming a bit notorious for this, so maybe I should find something else to earn the awe of others around the office.

Holden told his little sister something funny the other night

"I like Dinosaurs, Money, and Singing"

I mean seriously, who dosen't like a good dinosaur. And money.. c'mon. He loves when you give him a penny so he can put it in his pocket. But if you give him a dollar he shows his disapproval with a frown and gives it right back asking for "money" (i.e. coins). And boy can Holden let loose with the singing. I got a funny video of him dancing, it's not him singing, but it's pretty funny.

The family is doing great. I wish I didn't have to work on the house all the damn time... but it's really coming together now. I'm getting about a week or two away from drywalling the kitchen and installing cabinetry.

I Should Open a Candle Store

People who know me know my real name is CHADWICK. People who REALLY know me know that I have always wanted to open a candle store in the mall. The best part of all this and the only reason I want to open said store is my name. I would be clever and smart and call the store Chad's Wicks and it would be mega-awesome. I'd go into work and get that insane headache I get from the 42,183 different smells all congealed into one migrane inducing potpurri (we'd sell that too).

I lost the keys to this blog a few weeks back... hence the lack of updates. We had a tree fall down in the front yard of the house we are renting, pretty decent sized one too. I was actually surprised at how strong this tropical storm was... lots of damage around town. Holden incessently kept asking to go outside and play on the swingset... in a friggin' mini hurricane. Holden is very funny now, he says the funniest things at the funniest times. He has started with throwing "why" after everything you say, while nontheless is cute and fun.. can get old after you are 'bout 15 whys deep into explaining why we need to put garbage in the trash can. Pearl is also rather awesome, as she now cries "dadadada" when she's sad. And she can now sit up.. which just makes knocking her over more enojoyable for Larry.

Our dog Steven Alexander Stewart had to be put down a few weeks ago. For all the grief I gave him he was a good dog for us. Played well with the kids and was wicked nice at D&D. He was a level 45 Goblin (or so i've been told).

The house is coming along. I got nearly all of the downstairs wired and nearly ready for drywall. We have a lot of people coming down in october to paint, so i'm trying to get as much of it ready for that as I can.

One thought to leave with you... If drunk driving is illegal, then why do bars have parking lots?

People are talking

About my old blog over at myspace (you know, the place I go to solicit underage girls). I don't know why really... "Chad is really funny... he should start his own blog" they say. My blogging in the past has been fairly benign (sp?) and well, that's gotta change.

If people are gonna read your blog you have to really do something to grab their attention. wickCHAD is what my dyslexic friends have been calling me lately, so it seemed like a perfectly suitable name to start my adventure in the the world of arial font. Maybe someday i'll get up the courage to change said font... but I don't do everything on the first date.

My wife is getting terribly fancy with her blogging prowess. If the only way I can keep up is by producing pictures of our dog Steven playing dungeon and dragons under the couch.. then i'll do it. People who don't know our dog might think he's pretty tame, little do they know he's a raging beast with huge claws and an appetite for the calf (part of the leg, not the animal).

I'm basically a geek, proud parent, loving husband, son, uncle, nephew, cousin, co-worker... I think that covers it. I'm a huge Chiefs fan (football) and am getting really amped about the season getting ready to kick-off. It's actually cool now that Maria gets into football too (not really, but she pretends!)

So here it is, the wine bottle has been broken over the computer monitor and this blog is on it's maiden voyage. Where it will end up is anyones guess... I might update several times a year.. maybe once a month.. or things could get crazy and I could post everyday. This blog is mainly streaming conciousness, so bear (bare) with me si vou plat.