"I'll take two... to go!"

Wonder why us Americans are a bunch of big ole fatties?














This is the "Lady's Brunch Burger" (what type of "Lady" would eat this at a brunch?) If you can't tell from the picture, here is what this bad boy is made of

1/2 pound ground beef
1 tablespoon freshly chopped parsley leaves
1/2 tablespoon grated onion
House Seasoning, recipe follows
1/2 tablespoon butter
1 egg
3 slices bacon, cooked
2 glazed donuts

I know what I'm having for dinner tomorrow night!

Italian Food For The Ass

So we had a very busy second half of the weekend. We took the kids to basketball at the Y from 9-10am. Larry really dosen't like doing anything but passing, and Holden won't do things on his own when I am trying to help Larry. So we get done with basketball and we head on up to Baltimore for my God-daughter's 1st birthday. We hang out with family most of the day Saturday, and on Sunday we went to the party (which we had to leave really early for ANOTHER party 2 hours away). So we get there early to help out with getting the house ready and the food and whatnot. I get in the mini-van with Chuck, with what looks like red stuff all over the seat. The car wreaks of bad italian food and I ask him before I sit down if anything was spilled on the seat (it looked like a stain.. not fresh).

He told me "NO, we had some takeout that must still be in here somewhere" and that was good enough for me as I proceeded to sit in some nasty old italian spillage on the front passenger seat. I didn't notice it until several hours later when the wife is like "You smell like ass, what the hell?" I told her she was crazy and I didn't smell like anything. Until I got out of the car then the full bouquet of aromas hit me and it was bad... real bad. My pants looked like I had some sort of anal leakage.. nasty stuff. I had to change real fast and head over to the other party. Couldn't go to the party with that asstastic smell on my ass now could I?